I am the type of person who likes people on the spot. I want to like people even before I have gotten to know them. It takes me getting to know someone and their meanness to finally get me to distance myself from them, not want them as a close friend OR to dislike them.
I was writing a special blog post about gratitude for Pinay.com for the Pinay Sparkle series, exclusive for that website…
And while I was composing that I wrote the following:
Be thankful for the people you are with. The relationships you have…
And I realized in total honesty, I have finally gotten to an age where I only want to have relationships with people that I like, people who aren’t only smart, brilliant even, but whose energy is light, bright and positive.
In the past decade I’ve been getting better at choosing to connect with people whose presence in my life I CAN be thankful for. I no longer want to deal with people I don’t like… people who are awful because they make other people feel less-than or because the way they work is spiteful and bitter. I KNOW I don’t want to be with those types of people when they are going through their angry spewing modes. Not a roller-coaster ride I want to ride.
I was thinking now about these past couple of years when I had to deal with icky, crappy people—people whose choice of words are pointed and demeaning… I know that when I was putting my best efforts in that their negative style of communication was uncalled for. So I started vocalizing my choices… I started asking project managers to make sure that I’m not assigned to be on a team with people who are bullies because they don’t have THEIR act together… or I’ve asked people to improve their attitude OR to move on…
Then I don’t have to be nice just because I am nice—and put up with their non-nicesness in return… because they won’t be around anymore.
I’ve learned that no matter how impeccable you can be with your word, no matter how hard you might work at things, no matter how pleasant you can make things take place, there are just some people who’ve got things to spew and vent out of themselves in their modus operandi… and you might just happen to get in the way. So just be on your own way.
And I’ll talk in silence and pray to their Higher Self and ask that they figure things out—without me getting in the way… I’ll bless them and wish them beauty and lightness in whatever they do.
I feel lightened up now that I can be honest, reasonable and positive when I can request negative people not be in my circles any longer. I am grateful for the lessons they gave me, for what works and doesn’t work for me.
I am learning to be with people I CAN be thankful for.
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